Wendy Williams was never my jam.

I wasn't really interested in watching the documentary but all the buzz got me.

At the same time, I've been binge-listening to a Patreon podcast series chronicling the rise and ruin of Dave and Rachel Hollis (famed influencers who had tragic endings).

First of all, both series? Absolutely must watch/listen - although parts are incredibly painful.

It got me thinking about our identities and how pervasive it feels to live up to expectations.

Especially as Americans, are default belief is that when you have money, you can fix a lot of problems. And that life is easier.

But when the external expectations (whether perceived or self-generated) get so overwhelming, it's no wonder the addiction rate is so high.

Alcohol. Drugs. Shopping. Eating. Gambling. Sex. Social media.

The masks you wear to put on a happy face when your life is crumbling beneath your feet or the frozen face you put on when your boss is asking you where the TPS reports are.

But what became SO apparent across these instances was a profound loneliness.

If the people around you don't SEE you or you don't feel safe unless you are playing the role that is expected of you, it feels like a heartbreak.

Like if you showed up as you are, you wouldn't be worthy of love.

Personally, I've struggled for years with needing external validation.

It felt like I could craft the most desirable and ideal human if I did everything right and got the doggie treats for it, I'd be happy.

Until I just couldn't force the mask to stay on my face anymore. no matter how hard I tried.

I mean, don't get me wrong - I'm still caught in all the trappings of botox and hair color. #foreverjersey

But this is deeper.

It's a quest to find the real me underneath alllllll of the layers of steel that I thought would protect me - but ended up as a cage I didn't know how to escape.

And I know you are discovering the real you, too through all the twists and turns.

We are in the REDESIGN phase of our lives. But this time, it's on YOUR terms.

And one of the best ways to facilitate that is through redesigning the people you keep closest to you. I call it the personal advisory board. It's a NEW Friends with Benefits (ha! not that kind).

JOIN ME TODAY (3/7) for a free event to help you design your inner circle to be as high level as your professional one.

5 Simple Strategies to Build Your Personal Advisory Board 12pm EST. FREE. Only 30 minutes. No fluff.

Grab your spot here.

Okay, gotta run! I'm prepping to over-deliver for you at high noon today!

xo,

Allison

PS. While we are talking about redesign, catch the latest episode of Late Learner Podcast with board-certified dermatologist, Dr. Mary Alice Mina.

Listen here: EP107: Pro-aging and debunking beauty and skincare myths with Dr. Mary Alice Mina

PPS. Ready for a Spring refresh? Schedule a free breakthrough call with me and let's see if we can make magic together.