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Belonging and Identity shifts: a new perspective

January 18, 2024•3 min read


Oh sh*t! I was wrong this whole time? About ME?? Damn.

Have you noticed that the labels we have, whether earned or given, dictate how we behave?

Mom. Wife. Executive. Christian. Introvert. Employee. Pizza lover. Weirdo. Cheapskate. Health nut. Yankee fan. Hot mess. Gamer. Francophile. Swiftie. Mompreneur. Cosplay-er.

I bet your brain started categorizing this description above to form a certain archetype or person you might know or be. I know mine did and does!

Each of these social identities carries a certain set of expectations and guidelines. A sense of belonging to the tribe.

People like us do things like this. - Seth Godin

For me, I prided myself on being a workaholic, productivity pro, ultra-disciplined, supermom, fitness fanatic, and self-help aficionado.

As proud as I was to fashion my life around those once-coveted identities, it landed me in a desperate state of burnout, body dysmorphia, orthorexia, disordered eating (I mean, why not keep going? 🤷‍♀️), and feeling like I was going crazy.

Womp. Womp. 👎

When in reality, that tension I felt (or maybe you feel this, too) in your chest where you know deep down, something needs to change.

The pace isn't sustainable and frankly, the pats on the back are nice, but it's not that fun anymore.

Maybe you're feeling this sense of a change in the air.

I think about the scene in Mary Poppins where the wind changes, and it's time for MP to bounce and spread all her magic.

You can't quite put your finger on what you need - and wouldn't it be nice if....starts to color your thoughts in those in-between moments.

That pilot light is still on. But...

Our deep inherent need to belong is what keeps us stuck in the places where we've just plain outgrown.

Belonging to that group of friends that had your back long ago,

that healing community that took you in with open arms when you needed it the most,

that job that you used to be excited about but now it's run it's course,

the marriage that you tried and tried to fix but in the great words of BB King...the thrill is gone.

So now what? The answer may not be to ditch all your friends or blow up your life.

But it will require getting emotionally uncomfortable.

And evaluating your sources of energy and time.

And I have the perfect person to help us unpack what it means as you grow and change and make sure you've got the right support around you.

Heather Chauvin, leadership coach, parenting expert, and the host of the hit podcast Emotionally Uncomfortable is my guest on Late Learner podcast today.

Her no-BS unconventional approach (my favorite kind) will have you walking away with some more modern and effective tools.

EP204: Emotionally Uncomfortable to feeling good with Heather Chauvin

Here's are a few things you'll learn:

  • Shifting identities and rebuilding

  • Super effective 10-minute habit on having the feelings you want

  • Energetic time management and changing the emotional current

  • What is toxic motherhood?

  • Identity shifting is a death and how to handle it

  • Rethinking emotional intelligence in relationships

  • Do you use your children to block your success?

Eeeek! I am excited!



PS: Sometimes these boring award shows can punch it up by giving us exactly what we need.

PPS: If you're going through a shift (or thinking about it), facilitating these shifts are definitely my jam! I am offering a free breakthrough call as I am opening 2 new spots for private coaching.

PPPS. This NEW New Year challenge has been such a home run for our community, Doing one new thing a day to rewire the parts that feel like you might be in a rut, I've got the solution. If you haven't joined us yet, change that now!

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Allison Hare

Allison Hare is the former sales executive turned lifestyle entrepreneur. She’s the host of the award-winning, top 1.5% globally ranked podcast, Late Learner and a personal coach for professional mothers and a keynote speaker.

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